Zack's Montana Bride (Sweet, Clean Western Historical Romance)(Montana Ranchers and Brides Series) Read online

  And now they were all here. She was here. His head shook in disbelief as he gazed over at Lydia sitting on the long seat on the porch.

  When he got off his horse and went to tie the reins to the hitching rail, he saw Lydia watching him with an expression on her face that looked like fascination. Zack took a deep breath. He heard some excited yells from the stable. Through the open doors he could see the girls moving around animatedly as Ned explained horses to them. Zack was pleased to see the children happy.

  Lydia looked over toward the stable and smiled. "Sound's like they're having a great time," she said.

  Zack stepped up onto the porch, his boots noisy on the dusty wooden floor. "Ned knows a lot about horses. Looks like he also knows how to keep some rowdy kids under control. Or maybe I'm not seeing things right.," he said.

  "As long as they don't try riding any of those horses," she said.

  "Don't worry. We'll keep them well away."

  "There wasn't much call for them to learn to ride in San Francisco," Lydia explained.

  "I guess not. They'll get their chance here. Eventually. But it takes time to get used to animals out here. Especially after city living."

  Lydia sighed."They're only kids. They've got time on their hands."

  "They'll have all the time they need to get used to living here," Zack said.

  Lydia glanced at him and her expression became serious. "On that subject. Maybe we should talk about what's going to happen. Now that we're here," she said.

  Zack nodded. Straight to the point. He recalled that she had always been like that. Always been ready to offer an opinion, never shy to stand her ground. He'd always loved that about her. He wasn't surprised that she had three strong minded children. He'd have been amazed if they had turned out any other way, given the qualities their mother possessed. But there was more that Zack wanted to know before they got on to the subject he guessed she was as eager as him to talk about.

  Marriage.

  "Tell me something about the last few years," he said to her.

  Lydia raised a surprised brow. "Like what? I thought I'd given you all my recent misfortune in those letters."

  Zack sat down on the seat and leaned an arm across the back of the long wooden bench. Lydia didn't even move when his hand went close to her back. There was only the merest flicker of her eyes as his arm moved into position. A crease of a smile appeared at the edge of her mouth.

  "Tell me what things were like after you left me," he said.

  Her eyes narrowed at his choice of words and he immediately regretted how they sounded. He was beginning to learn that living with four new women in his life was going to force him to become a whole lot more tactful.

  "I'm sorry. I didn't mean that to sound like it did," he said quickly.

  Lydia smiled. "It's okay. I know what you mean. In any case, it's what happened. I left you. You didn't walk away from me. Nor did we ever have a falling out. We never disagreed, or argued about anything, as far as I recall," she said.

  Zack smiled. "Well, that's not quite true. There was that time when you thought I'd forgotten your birthday, and you didn't take too kindly to me pretending that I'd arranged to go out for a night on the town with my friends, Aaron and Joshua."

  Lydia playfully smacked him on the shoulder. "I'd forgotten all about that. And here I was thinking you and I were always the perfect couple," she said.

  Zack grew serious for a moment and moved closer to Lydia. Once again she didn't move away from him, merely watching him with her beautiful blue eyes. Eyes that Zack thought he could stare into for the rest of his life. Eyes that captivated him and drew him in close, exactly as they had done so many years before.

  "We were the perfect couple. Wasn't that true?" he said.

  Lydia smiled and blinked slowly in agreement, but she didn't say anything in response.

  Zack sighed and paused before continuing. He wasn't sure how far he should go talking about the past, or how quickly he should move on and get to the main topic they both had to consider.

  "And don't we still look like a good couple?"

  Lydia turned away and Zack felt a sinking sensation in his gut.

  "Things are so different now," Lydia said. "So much has happened. I wonder if we are the same people we once were."

  Zack leaned closer. "Even if we're not, even if life has changed us both, all that matters is that we are together again."

  Lydia turned back to him and Zack felt the heaviness become stronger in his gut when he saw the expression in her eyes.

  Suddenly he heard a voice coming from the direction of the stable. He looked over in the direction and saw Kate come running out of the stable. "Mama. Gretchen won't let me touch any of the horses," Kate shouted. It was the first time he'd heard Kate speak in such a loud voice. Since she'd arrived she'd been the quietest of the children. But now her voice carried strongly across the width of the yard.

  "Tell her it's okay. I said so. Just do what Ned tells you," Lydia suggested.

  Zack watched Lydia giving advice to her daughter and saw the years of experience and patience that could only come with dedicated motherhood. Lydia was different. He could see that now. She'd acquired depths of patience and calm that were in stark contrast the fitful ebullience of her younger years. Zack wondered how long it would take him to adjust to this new aspect of Lydia.

  "Ned will make sure they don't startle the horses," Zack said.

  "I'm so glad the children have found something to be excited about. They were really worried about coming to live here."

  "Then they know?" he asked, not prepared to elaborate any further.

  "Know what?" Lydia asked.

  "About us."

  "I haven't told them that you and I were close. Only that we were friends because I once lived here with their grandfather," Lydia explained.

  "Do they know the real reason they've come here?"

  Lydia's eyes narrowed and she looked suddenly thoughtful. "That their mother is going to marry again and that they're going to spend their days here in Montana? Yes. I had to tell them. I'm not going to lie to them. I'm their mother."

  Lydia suddenly sounded irritated and Zack realized he'd touch a raw nerve.

  "It's just that I wasn't sure how the children feel about it," he said.

  Lydia sighed and glanced over toward the stable. "If it was me at their age, I'd be terrified and excited all at once. But they've had so much to deal with recently. This is just one more thing they've had to accept."

  Her voice cracked slightly and Zack had the sudden urge to reach out, console her, tell her that everything was going to be fine from now on. But he resisted the impulse, choosing to merely nod, which right now felt like the most ineffective thing he could have done to make Lydia feel better. Because that was all he wanted to do. Make everything good for her and those beautiful children in that stable.

  "I can hardly comprehend what they've been through. They have obviously inherited the strength of their mother," Zack said softly.

  Lydia looked at him and her face softened. "They've also got the spirit of their father too," she said.

  Zack nodded. "What was Daniel like? What kind of man was he?"

  Zack knew that he'd had to ask that question. It just seemed like the right thing to do. He needed to know as much about what Lydia's life had been like since the day she had left him. He needed to understand if he was going to have any chance of making things right for her.

  "He was a kind, sweet man. A wonderful father. A strong man with strong emotions. Sometimes they got the better of him. But he was always good to the children," Lydia said softly, her eyes gazing into the past.

  Zack swallowed. The way she'd spoken about her departed husband had such warmth, such genuine heartfelt appreciation, that Zack had the sudden, foolish doubt that he could ever hope to compare to Daniel. That he could ever, truly win Lydia's heart back, the way he'd once held it, possessed it.

  "And what kind of a husband was he?" Zack aske
d curtly, ashamed that he could even ask such a question here on the porch with the sun starting to sink toward the mountains, the air fresh with the winter chill.

  Lydia glanced at Zack. He thought she looked surprised at his question. But, there was only the briefest hesitation before she replied. "He was a fine husband. A loving man who was so very kind to me," she stated, and then made it clear to Zack that she wanted to say nothing more about Daniel for the moment.

  The sadness in her eyes made Zack's heart sink. The enjoyment of their first family dinner seemed a long way off.

  Zack knew that now there was only one thing he had to ask Lydia Robards; one of the most important questions he would ever utter in his life; a question that had coursed through his mind so many times in the last few weeks. He'd struggled to find the right words during the long nights he'd imagined this moment. Out on the range, solitary and alone, he'd tried to figure out how to say this most essential thing to the only woman who had ever meant anything to him. The woman who had miraculously reappeared in his life and who now sat before him, her eyes wide with expectation, patient and tranquil.

  Zack's insides were anything but tranquil. His heart was thudding like it had been when she had arrived earlier that day. His throat was tight, his gut was churning. Was this how every man felt before asking the question? Did everyone go through this?

  Then, all his worries evaporated in an instant when he saw something that told him that there was absolutely nothing to be concerned about.

  Lydia smiled at him.

  He felt relief surge through his body and it was only then that he found the courage to speak.

  "Lydia? I have to ask you something."

  Lydia's eyes widened. "Yes, Zack?"

  "I don't rightly know the perfect words, so I'd be as well just coming out straight with it," Zack said.

  "You don't need to find the perfect words, Zack. I know what you're talking about," Lydia reassured him.

  Zack nodded. "Uh. Huh. I thought you might," he said. He took a deep breath and fixed his eyes on Lydia's.

  "Lydia. Will you do the me the honor of becoming my wife?"

  Lydia's eyes narrowed with the smile that appeared on her face. "I would be happy to become your wife, Zack. Very happy."

  As he heard her say the words, Zack felt a jolt of primitive energy surge through his body. It was if he were sitting on a bucking bronco and it was about to throw him over. Involuntarily, Zack stood up and clenched his fists by his side. He felt like the only thing he could do was to yell loud enough to bring Mrs. Brodie scurrying from the kitchen.

  Zack looked down at Lydia and saw that she was watching him with a fascinated smile.

  Zack kneeled down at Lydia's feet and seized one of her hands. "I promise to care for you and the children with all that I have to offer in body, mind and soul. You know I'm a man of my word. I tell you that I will move heaven and earth to make sure you and those beautiful children there are happy and safe. Believe me, Lydia."

  She looked at him with surprise at the strength of feeling in his voice. For his part, Zack felt that a lid had been taken off feelings and thoughts that had been kept in check for far too long.

  "I believe you, Zack," Lydia said softly. "I never had any doubt that you would keep your promise," she said.

  "Never doubt me, Lydia. Don't ever make that mistake," he said.

  Lydia smiled down at him and gave his hand a gentle squeeze. "I won't."

  Holding her hand there was only one more thing to say to Lydia. It had been burning inside him ever since the day she'd left. Now felt like the right time to say what he'd needed to say for so long.

  "I know that this marriage might look like a marriage of convenience," he said. "But it's more than that to me. I think you know that already."

  Lydia's brows furrowed immediately and Zack took a breath and continued. "I think that with time, even a marriage of convenience can harbor something that can approach...love."

  Zack felt Lydia's hand tighten and he was suddenly aware that she had pulled it ever so slightly away from him.

  "Marriages of convenience are very commonplace in these times, Zack. People's circumstances sometimes force such an arrangement upon them."

  Zack felt a chill up his spine. "Arrangement? Is that how you see this marriage, Lydia?"

  Lydia finally tugged on her hand and Zack released her fingers. "That's not what I meant, Zack. It's just that this is all so very hasty. Rather difficult to understand. Even if it's so very necessary," Lydia said, her voice assuming the same cool tone Zack had noted earlier.

  Why was she saying this to him? Were her feelings about the marriage so very different from his? Had it been the mention of love which had triggered this response?

  "I'm not sure I know what you mean, Lydia. I thought we had an understanding," he said.

  Lydia took in a deep breath. Her posture stiffened and Zack knew he was suddenly facing an uphill struggle. Lydia looked away.

  "Have I said something to offend you, Lydia?"

  She stood and clutched her hands tight in front of her. "You haven't said anything wrong, Zack. Trust me."

  Zack stood up and faced Lydia, restraining the urge to once again take her hands in his.

  Lydia looked quickly over toward the stable and then turned to look at Zack. "I think all that's been said is sufficient. The girls might need my help in the stable. I must go to them."

  Lydia made to step away from him, but Zack gently took her arm.

  "Lydia. Tell me what's wrong," Zack asked.

  She sighed and looked at him, her gaze suddenly distant, transformed from what it had been minutes before.

  "I'd be happy to help you arrange the wedding at your earliest convenience," she said.

  "The minister has already told me he can carry out the ceremony as soon as we wish," Zack said.

  Lydia nodded. "I think the girls will need some outfits. They didn't bring anything suitable for a wedding. For myself, I already have an outfit which will be appropriate," she said.

  Zack felt his stomach turn at the calm sound of her voice, the way she seemed to be pushing him away.

  Finally, he could see that there was nothing to do but agree with Lydia's suggestion.

  With a glance, Lydia turned and strode off toward the stable and Zack could only take a seat on the porch and, with a sinking heart and a mind filled with questions, watch her walk slowly away from him.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  Lydia was nervous and she knew exactly why that was.

  Today was her wedding day.

  She sat on the buggy and gazed far ahead at the trail which would deliver her to Great Falls, and to the church where the marriage ceremony would be carried out. Lydia felt her heart skip a beat. Zack sat next to her, the reins held tight in his hands, looking more elegant, more handsome than she had ever thought possible. He turned and smiled at her and she responded with a hesitant one of her own. Zack looked nervous too and that gave Lydia a moment of relief. She wasn't alone. Never would be from this moment on.

  Lydia glanced back at the other buggy behind them. Ned was steering it and the children were crammed onto the seats, Daisy and Kate next to Ned, Gretchen and Mrs. Brodie in the rear. They were all smiling and looked eager and excited at the prospect of a wedding.

  The past few days had been a whirl of activity. Somehow Lydia's marriage to Daniel seemed to have been a much simpler affair. She couldn't remember there having been so much to prepare. They'd made frequent long trips into town to buy material for dresses and all the sundries that were needed to make sure that the day to come would be truly memorable.

  Lydia turned and settled her gloved hands in her lap and tried, once more, to maintain at least the illusion of composure. But her insides were tumbling and those butterflies in her stomach just wouldn't stop fluttering, no matter what she told them.

  Lydia glanced once more at Zack. He looked so darned handsome in his fine tailored dark suit, waistcoat, neatly pinned collar and dark,
shiny boots. He looked like a prosperous ranch owner, a man who knew what to do in life. Lydia felt a tingle of pride as she looked at him.

  When she'd seen him earlier that morning, standing by the side of the buggy, fixing the colorful pink and blue ribbons along the side, Lydia thought she'd never seen a man look so elegant, so self assured. The only thing that concerned her right now was how tired he looked. The dark rings under his eyes spoke of nights without sleep, and she was sure it wasn't just because a bunk house full of men would be a noisy place to try and settle.

  Since asking her to marry her a week ago, he'd spent every night sleeping in the bunk house, with the ranch hands. He'd explained that there just wasn't enough room in the ranch house for all of them. He didn't want to ask Mrs. Brodie to give up her room. Neither did he even mention the possibility of him sleeping in the same room as Lydia. Not with the children crammed into the room across the hall. In any case, it wasn't unusual for Daisy to become troubled during the night and need to go to Lydia.

  So, Zack had spent the last week sleeping in the draft ridden, cold wooden shack that was the employees accommodation block.

  Only on a couple of those cold nights had Daisy come to Lydia. So, she had spent most of the nights on her own, with too much time to think, and too many memories that just plain disturbed her. On more than one occasion she'd thought about how pleasant it would have been to have Zack by her side, even if it would have been just to comfort her, to speak to her, to tell her not to worry. But Zack's sense of propriety was still as well developed as it had been all those years ago. He'd always been sensitive to the needs of others.

  Lydia pulled the thick coat she was wearing over her wedding dress close up against her body. It was a chilly December morning. Zack had insisted Lydia wear the heavy woollen overcoat to protect her from the winter cold. With a similarly heavy woollen hat on her head, Lydia knew she didn't exactly look like someone on their way to church to get married. But there was no sense in taking chances with the wild Montana winters. They were long. That much she had remembered from previous years. But she'd forgotten just how cold they could be. San Francisco had spoiled her in more ways than she'd realized.